Appleton Insurance

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By: Tom Schulte

It was complete. Upon hanging the last couple of pictures that had been waiting in boxes within the basement, we had finally, ‘officially’ finished the move-in process, roughly 7 months after beginning it. To celebrate, Khrista and I prepared a particularly tasty dinner to enjoy on our back porch, paired with some dinner music playing in the background. As we basked in the early-evening sun, I reached for my phone to switch songs, at which time I saw an unread message from my landlord. While the message was written in a courteous and polite fashion, it was sent with the intent to inform me of his plans of selling his unit, thus, effectively putting my dog and I on the street.

This would have been an easier pill to swallow if we hadn’t loved our new apartment so much. I had an easy commute to our Braintree office, great relationship with a dog walker whom we whole-heartedly trusted, friendly neighbors, and updated appliances with all the bells and whistles. On top of that, the Boston rental scene is cutthroat and unforgiving, particularly at this time of year. Labeling myself as ‘distraught’ may be an understatement as I began skimming and navigating the literally thousands of Craigslist and Zillow adds for available units.

As it stands, I have roughly 30 ongoing conversations with brokers, landlords, property managers, and scammers. Additionally, the listing agent representing my current landlord is on a mission to expedite my status as ‘homeless,’ by attempting to schedule an open house or showing several times a week. It is a legitimate battle, however they are armed with legal documents, while I have nothing but tears.  

I nearly gave up the search last Thursday. We had found a suitable unit, in a building we did not particularly like, with a monthly rental above our desired price-range. I sat here, at my desk, complaining to anyone within ear-shot (Jenn) about how I could not possibly go through yet another apartment showing, which was scheduled for that evening. As always, Jenn provided an explicit, yet powerful motivational speech, sending me to Boston’s South End to meet with the landlord. And of course, it was perfect. Loaded with amenities, in a building oozing with character, I have found a place I’d be happy to call home.   

While the exposed beams and nearby Dog Park are nice, the most important feature is the ‘Appleton Insurance’ that comes with it. Undocumented and unbeknownst to Alex Weiss, Appleton insurance is my plan to move to Alex’s spare bedroom once I am inevitably homeless this time next year. Our potential proximity makes it a no-brainer, in addition to the ‘rent-free’ status that I will skillfully negotiate.

The goal of this article is not centered on reader-entertainment, rather it is the solicitation of positive energy, well-wishes, and good vibes as we near the finale of the South End application process.